Petrov, Yelyena And Me

Petrov, Yelyena, and me

Lost, but happy, at sea

Petrov and Yelyena said to me

"Shouldn't we have something to eat?"

I say there are plenty of fish in the sea

But all they can see is me



They said "Any last requests?"

Biding my time, I said, "Yes

I want to party, just we three

Lost, but happy, at sea"



So we drank all night from the keg

I passed out, then awoke with one leg

I said "Petrov, have you seen my leg?"

He said "No," and he went back to bed

But he looked suspiciously well fed



Three days later, they were hungry again

They said "Any last requests, my friend, again?"

So I said "Do you know any Rolling Stones?"

It was a hilarious moment in a very bleak, bleak time of my life



So we danced all night to the Rolling Stones

When I awoke, they were chewing on bones

Yelyena was supping blood from a cup

That's when I knew that something was up



"Hey Petrov, what is that you're eating?"

"It's fish"

"How come it looks so much like my arm which

has been hacked off at the elbow last night?"

"Oh, it's an arm fish"



Later that night, while they were asleep

I swallowed some arsenic to poison my meat

I was very ill, but revenge is so sweet

Unlike the last meal my comrades would eat



When I awoke, they were already dead

All that was left of me was my head

No, not dead, just a head

Lost, but so lonely

At sea