Ernie Cleans Up The Apartment

Part One:



(Ernie, singing loudly and wordlessly,

is throwing stuff around the living room.)



Bert: Hey, Ernie, cut that out!

Cut that out! (Ernie stops.

) Look at this mess! Boy, you are the sloppiest person

I know! Now, if you don't get this place cleaned up,

I'm gonna move in with Oscar. His garbage can's neater than this. Wow!



Ernie: Oh, don't worry, Bert,

I'm gonna get this place so clean you wouldn't recognize

it. I'm telling you, Bert,

when I'm finished in here, you could eat off the floor!



Bert (mirthlessly): Ha, ha, ha. I'll believe that when I see it.



Ernie: Okay, stand back; just give me some room here ...



Part Two:



(The same scene. Ernie is humming and brushing some dirt into a dustpan.)



Bert (entering): Hey, Ernie,

the place looks terrific!

(I think Bert might have said some line here I don't

recall.) Hey, are you finished?



Ernie: Well, just about, Bert. I gotta go clean out my toybox.



Bert: Well, go to it! It's beautiful!



Ernie: Okay, I gotta go clean out my toybox.

(Takes things out of it, one at a time,

then throws each one over his shoulder after naming

it.) Let see, I got my Rubber Duckie.

Don't want to forget that .

.. I got my paper-clip collection .

.. my X, to mark the Spot .

.. my dog, Spot ... that's his name,

Spot ... Let's see, I got my worm collection .

.. old tape ... my football helmet .

.. my tinfoil ball ... a peanut butter sandwich .

.. Let's see ... down here ...



(Scene changes to show Bert standing nearby and sighing

as the stuff lands around him.)