My Daddy Knew Dixie Howell

Seein' that tomorrow's my birthday

Happy birthday to you

Seein' that this is the final night of my 29th year

Happy birthday to you

Seein' that all my fuckin' friends were assembled here to greet me

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

I'm gonna tell you all the story of my life

I'm gonna tell you all the story of my life



My daddy knew Dixie Howell,

He used to cut his hair

Daddy had a shop in Tuscaloosa,

And Howell was on a team up there

When I was born, Daddy put a football in my cradle

Later on, he put a football helmet in my bed

So when he died I put a razor in his coffin

And poured Vaseline all over his head.

Magnolias, magnolias, magnolias they had

The people come from mile around

To follow Daddy's coffin to the graveyard

And put poor Daddy's body in the ground

Magnolias, you should have smelled the magnolias, Daddy

Don't you wish it was me layin' there instead?

But tomorrow I will be sober, Daddy,

And you will still be dead