Best Of All Possible Worlds

I was runnin' through the summer rain



Tryin' to catch that evenin' train



And kill that old familiar pain



Weavin' through my tangled brain



But when I tipped my bottle back



I smacked into a cop I didn't see



That policeman said, "Mr. Cool



If you're ain't drunk then you're a fool"



I said, "Well, if that's against the law



Then tell me why I never saw



A man locked in that jail of yours



That wouldn't just as lowdown poor as me"



Well, that was when someone turned out the lights



And I wound up in jail to spend the night



And dream of all the wine and lonely girls



In this best of all possible worlds



Well, I woke up next morning



Feelin' like my head was gone



And like my thick old tongue



Was lickin' somethin' sick and long



And I told that man I'd sell my soul



For somethin' wet and cold in that old cell



Well, that kindly jailer just grinned at me



All eaten up with sympathy



Then he poured himself another beer



And he came and whispered in my ear



That booze was just a dime a bottle



Boy, you couldn't even buy the smell



I said, "I knew there was somethin' I liked bout this town



But it takes more than that to bring me down, down, down, down"



But there's a lot of wine and lonely girls



In this best of all possible worlds



Well, they finally came and they told me



They was a gonna set me free



And that I'd be leavin' town



If I knew what was good for me



I said, "It's nice to learn that everybody's



So concerned about my health"



I said, "I won't be leavin' no more



Quicker than I fastly can



'Cause I've enjoyed about



As much of this as I can stand



And I don't need this town of yours more



Than I never needed nothin' else"



'Cause there's still a lot of drinks that I ain't drunk



And there's lots of pretty thoughts that I ain't thought, oh yeah



And Lord, there's still so many lonely girls



In this best of all possible worlds



Well, step right up to the wild [Incomprehensible]



[Incomprehensible] to the young



Step back, step back [Incomprehensible]



[Incomprehensible]