I Can't Be Counted On

Give me lots of money

A house up on a hill

Send me pretty women

Or threaten me and still



I'll come out to your house

And attempt to fix your sink

Do a mediocre job

As I'm leaving you will think



If you're needing something

You know that I'll be gone

I will not answer when you call

If you're waiting for me

Then you'll be waiting long

I can't be counted on at all



My eye is on the pork

The pork is in the pan

If something needs a 'doing

Well, you know I'm not your man



If you're counting on me

You know I'll let you down

You can't be counting on me

Cause you know I'm just a clown