The Midget's Lament

I walk in, I ain't too dumb

I know I got some handicaps t'overcome

I mean y'seen one midget, y'seen 'em all

Oh yeah, midget, oh yeah, small



And that's as far as you can see

Is that the sum

And total substance of me?

Midgets dwarfs chimps in a zoo

They all look alike to you



Well listen good 'cause I don't lie

There's a whole lot more to me

Than meets the eye

And it fills my little soul with midget hate



The way that people will not learn

To differentiate, yeah, sure midget

That's what you say

And that's as far as it goes



But have you ever said

That's a Hungarian midget?

Or that's a midget

With a wart on his nose?



Have you ever taken the time to notice

A midget with curly hair

It isn't fair, there are skinny midgets

Fat midgets, gay midgets, flat midgets



There are midgets in deep despair

Half a soul half a brain, half a heart

And twice the pain, sure they're cute



And they're a lot of fun

But would you want your sister

To marry one?



Midget small, that's it and that's all

The classification it is made

Midget runt, well, now I gotta be blunt

I wish I was born



I wish I was born a spade

Sure I would still be a midget

But I would have such

Such beautiful coloration



And among my fellow midgets

I would be a sensation

Talk about standing out in the pack



I wish I was black

Midgets dwarfs chimpanzees

Ain't it all relative

When you're on your knees?



So don't tell me, don't tell me

About minorities

I wish to Christ, I wish to Christ

I was black