My History

My history surrounds me

And it's closing in around my bed

And all I have known

Has turned to sticks and to stones

But these words are wandering/a dream/would ring in my head



I've got you paper for ten

Not the kind tradition meant

But the kind that says

I'm walking out that door

And my heart breaks in two

A little for me and a little for you

Still this thing

Is just the thing I've got to do



For so long I was on my own

Seeking shelter from what I've known

Like the last leaves of the fall's last embrace

Waiting for it all to drop

Like a big new year's ball

With just a past and a song for the lost



I've got you paper for ten

Not the kind tradition meant

But the kind that says

I'm walking out that door

And my heart breaks in two

A little for me and a little for you

Still this thing

Is just the thing I've got to do



Now the glass has filled with sand

I look down and don't know my own hands

I thought that surely the answers would be revealed

We'd know it'd all been for the better

The hurt's past like a forgotten winter

But I'm haunted by these words instead

When I say it



I've got you paper for ten

Not the kind tradition meant

But the kind that says

I'm walking out that door

And my heart breaks in two

A little for me and a little for you

Still this thing

Is just the thing I've got to do



Still this thing is just the thing that I've

It's just the thing that I've gotta do