Artist/Band:
Frank Zappa
Lyrics for Song: Prologue
Lyrics for Album: Ahead Of Their Time [1993]
THING-FISH:
Once upon a time, musta been 'round October, few years back, in one o'
dose TOP SECRET LAB-MOTORIES de gubbnint keep stashed away
underneath Virginia, an EVIL PRINCE, occasion'ly employed as a part-time
THEATRICAL CRITICIZER set to woikin' on a plot fo de systematic
GENOCIDICAL REMOVE'LANCE of all unwanted highly-rhythmic individj'lls
an' sissy-boys!
De cocksucker done whiffed up a secret POTIUM... an' right 'long wid it, de
ATROCIOUS IDEA dat what he been boilin' up down deahhhh jes' mights be
de FINAL SOLUTIUM to DE WHITE MAIN'S 'BOIDENNN', ef yo' acquire my
drift...
Well, he were sure he had a GOOD THING GOIN'... but, dere was always de
possobility dat somethin' might fuck up, so, he planned to have a little test,
jes' to check it all out befo' he dump't it in de wattuh supply.
Sho'tly denafter, wit HIGH-LEVEL GUBNINT CO-ROBBERATIUM, he arranged
to have a good-will visit to SAN QUENTIM, 'long wit some country-westin
mu- zishnin's, 'n sprinkle a little bit of it on some of de boys in deahhh
(since dey done used a few of 'em befo' when dey was messin' wit de
ZYPH'LISS).
So, heah dey come wit de POTIUM, dump'nit all in de mash potatoes!
Den dey wen' up to de warden's office fo' some HOT TODDY, watchin' a little
football while dey's waitin' to see what gone happen!
Fact o' de matter were: NOTHIN' HAPPENED, so dey went off'n dribbled it in
a special shipnint of GALOOT CO-LOG-NUH dat went out 'bouts NOVEMBER!
Next thing y'know, fagnits be droppin' off like flies...'long wit a large number
of severely-tanned individj'lls, pre-zumnably of HAY'CHEN EXTRAKMENT!
But NOT DE BOYS IN DE REST HOME! Oh no! Mixin' de shit wit de mash
potatoes done SMOOTHED IT OUT a little, so's it wouldn't KILL yo' ass, BUT,
it sho' would make y'ugly! 'N ef y'was already UGLY, it'd make yo ass
MEAN 'n UGLY...'n ef you was already MEAN 'n UGLY, it'd turn ya into a
strange, UNKNOWN KREETCHUH, never befo' seen on BROADWAY!^LThass
right! It'd turn ya' into a 'MAMMY NUN'! Head like a potato...lips like a
duck...big ol' hands, puffin' up! BIG ONES! Science! ME-jev'l re-LIJ-mus
costumery all over yo' BODY! Yow! Oh yeah! Mmmm-hmmm!
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