Artist/Band:
Andrew Lloyd Webber
Lyrics for Song: Poor Fool
Lyrics for Album: Phantom Of The Opera [1986]
COUNTESS (CARLOTTA)
Poor fool, he makes me laugh!
Ha ha Ha ha Ha ! (Ect.)
Time I tried to get a better, better~half !
COUNTESS AND CHORUS
Poor fool, he doesn't know!
Ho ho Ho ho Ho! (etc.)
If he knew the truth, he'd never, ever~go!
(Suddenly from nowhere, we hear the voice of the PHANTOM)
PHANTOM'S VOICE
Did I not instruct that Box Five was to be kept empty?
MEG (terrified)
He's here: the Phantom of the Opera . . .
CHRISTINE
It's him . . . I know it . . . it's him . . .
CARLOTTA
Your part is silent, little toad!
(But the PHANTOM has heard her)
PHANTOM'S VOICE
A toad, madame? Perhaps it is you who are the toad . . .
CARLOTTA (As the COUNTESS)
Serafimo, away with this pretence!
You cannot speak, but kiss me in my *croak*!
(Instead of singing she emits a great croak like a toad. A
stunned silence. The PHANTOM is laughing -
quietly at first, then more and more hysterically)
CARLOTTA (as the COUNTESS)
Poor fool, he makes me laugh -
Hahahahaha!
Croak, croak, croak,
croak, croak, croak, etc.
(As before. The PHANTOM'S laughter rises. The
croaking continues as the chandelier's lights blink on
and off. The PHANTOM'S laughter, by this time
overpowering, now crescendos into a great cry):
PHANTOM'S VOICE
Behold! She is singing to bring down the chandelier!
(CARLOTTA looks tearfully up at the MANAGERS ' box
and shakes her head)
CARLOTTA
Non posso piu . . .
I cannot . . . I cannot go on . . .
FIRMIN
Ladies and gentlemen, the performance will
continue in ten minutes' time . . .
(He addresses Box Five, keeping one eye on the
chandelier as it returns to normal)
. . . when the role of the Countess will be sung by Miss
Christine Daae.
ANDRE
In the meantime, ladies and gentlemen, we shall be
giving you the ballet from Act Three of tonight's opera.
(to the CONDUCTOR)
Maestro - the ballet - now!
(The BALLET GlRLS enter as a sylvan glade
flies in. They begin the Dance of the Country Nymphs.
Upstage, behind the drop, a series of threatening
shadows of the PHANTOM. MEG is aware of them and
dances out of step. When this culminates in one
gigantic, oppressive, bat-like shadow, the garotted body
of JOSEPH BUQUET falls onto the stage, causing the
sylvan glade to fly out. Pandemonium.)
***A LARGE SHRILL SCREAM ENSUES***
CHRISTINE (calling for help)
Raoul! Raoul!
RAOUL
Christine, come with me . . .
CHRISTINE
No. . . to the roof. We'll be safe there.
FIRMIN (Attempting to placate the audience)
Ladies and gentlemen, please remain in your seats. Do
not panic. It was an accident . . . simply an accident .
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