Jeannie's Got A Problem With Her Uterus
Screeching Weasel · Thank You Very Little [2000]
Jeannie's having problems with her ovaries
She's got trouble with her tubes
If you go past her vagina and her cervix
You will find a completely empty room
Because Jeannie's got a problem with her uterus
Her uterus is useless
Her physician has injected fluids in her private parts
But she just won't believe
That the efforts to eradicate her female trouble
Will cause her to conceive
No simple yeast or bladder infection
Could compare to the pain that Jeannie's going through
This year her husband's sperm was studied
And swiftly passed the test
Now Jeannie's operation must commence
Artificial insemination can't fertilize poor Jeannie's rotten eggs
Jeannie isn't ovulating
Even though she took all the proper pills
Jeannie wants a baby but she cannot pay the giant doctor bills
She's got trouble with her tubes
If you go past her vagina and her cervix
You will find a completely empty room
Because Jeannie's got a problem with her uterus
Her uterus is useless
Her physician has injected fluids in her private parts
But she just won't believe
That the efforts to eradicate her female trouble
Will cause her to conceive
No simple yeast or bladder infection
Could compare to the pain that Jeannie's going through
This year her husband's sperm was studied
And swiftly passed the test
Now Jeannie's operation must commence
Artificial insemination can't fertilize poor Jeannie's rotten eggs
Jeannie isn't ovulating
Even though she took all the proper pills
Jeannie wants a baby but she cannot pay the giant doctor bills
Jeannie's Got A Problem With Her Uterus
Released on Screeching Weasel's 2000 album Thank You Very Little, this track exemplifies the band's signature blend of punk energy and absurdist humor. The song features the group's characteristic rapid-fire delivery and chaotic instrumentation, typical of their work in the early 2000s era. It serves as a prime example of their ability to transform mundane or bizarre premises into high-octane rock anthems. The recording captures the raw, unpolished aesthetic that defined their discography during this period, offering a stark contrast to their earlier, more polished recordings while maintaining their core identity as a force of chaotic entertainment in the punk scene.