Kris Kringle Was A Car Thief
Wesley Willis · Other Songs - Wesley Willis
parked behind my house
He used a screwdriver to jimmy the lock
After that he jumped into the stolen car and started up the motor
He drove away the stolen car in hot pursuit
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle was a car thief
Kris Kringle sped down West Fullerton Avenue looking for hookers
He was firewalling the throttle
When the Chicago police officers spotted the stolen
Maverick as it soon passed them they turned on their sirens
Then they went after the beat up stolen Maverick
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle was a car thief
The police pulled Kris Kringle over
Kris Kringle tried to escape from the police
He was arrested for auto theft
He was whisked away to jail
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle
Kris Kringle was a car thief
Kris Kringle was a car thief
Kris Kringle was a car thief
Kris Kringle was a car thief
Rock over London, rock on Chicago
Mitsubishi - the word is getting around
Kris Kringle Was A Car Thief
Wesley Willis delivers a sharp, satirical take on holiday tropes with 'Kris Kringle Was A Car Thief,' a track that blends punk energy with biting social commentary. Released as part of his discography, the song subverts the traditional Santa narrative, framing the jolly figure as a criminal rather than a benevolent giver. Willis's delivery is characterized by his signature aggressive vocal style and rhythmic intensity, typical of his work in the punk and alternative rock genres. The recording captures the raw, unpolished aesthetic often found in his catalog, prioritizing attitude and lyrical edge over production sheen. By targeting cultural icons with humor and disdain, the song exemplifies Willis's ability to transform mundane or festive themes into provocative statements, resonating with listeners who appreciate music that challenges norms through direct, confrontational performance.